Deannaloveserik
Disclaimer Jon change it if you want.
Now homeless, hungry, and alone with near strangers Cordell had tears well up in her eyes as she realized that she wasn’t going to be able to go back home for a long time, if her parents were even still alive. They had traveled further into the forest, away from the inpending search parties.
She was standing off in the corner trying to suppress the emotion. Her mother had not prepared her well enough to make the journey alone. Fortunately, they had already met up with Will and got all the hellos out of the way.
However, the other girl, Bonita if she remembered correctly, was frantic. She blamed losing her home and her safety and being forced into this mess all on him and he was debating if he should go back for the other monk. The bickering was not helping and she knew it had to stop.
“Stop it! Stop it all of you!” she had finally snapped she had enough, tears now welling down her face. “Just shut up!-“ turning to run she stopped realizing the futility of going any direction alone. Feeling totally powerless she collapsed. After a short pause she whispered loud enough for them both to hear, “We’re the only ones we have right now, we've got to do something…"
Her mind raced and flashed as she remembered her mother had told her this day would come and had even forced her to memorize a map on where to go if she ever needed to hide the key from being found.
She stood up and turned back to them her entire countenance changed in an instant, "Bonnie, I hope I can call you that, please find us some food and then I shall take you both some place safe. Don't ask me how but I just know a place that is safe from Bartholomew's grasp."
--
(Only took out the last sentence or two below and expanded Crooks response)
Off in the distance a heavily armored man happily doing a little jaunt towards the little unnamed town. “it’s easier to tell them of their demise if you don’t know that.” Bartholomew had pre-sent him to do this when he had heard about the medallion. “Killing birds over a stone.” The mailman recalled as he began to run faster, he could see the edge of the city now. “The entry is always the hardest, I wish Bartholomew would send me in less flashy armor so the city wouldn’t always know I’m coming.” The mailman had his suspicions that he really didn’t wont mail men to survive but every time he did he was dually paid. “Bartholomew’s a nice guy” the mailman thought to himself, either that or he enjoys rather odd hobbies.
“Sir, we see a messenger!”
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
soo confused! stop calling me a barbarian or I will quit writing. I thought I was in charge of Cordell, but I don't care if you want to write for her. I don't know what to write.
ReplyDeletelol yeah luke is wierd i'ma fix
ReplyDeleteoh and luke was/is just trying to help
ReplyDeleteyeah I totally changed my mind, sry mega revision coming soon, like five minutes
ReplyDeleteAnd Dee if you would like I can totally take over Cordell as she just became much more important in the overall scheme of things. Thanks, anyways go ahead and god-mod our characters and find some food of some kind if you would like or whatever else.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your patient and I will personally drive up to Byu-I and break Luke if he calls your character a barbarian again.
PS Yes it will be fun.
whoa whoa calm down yall. i just tryed to type it to her character but yes i'll try not to call yall a barbarian.
ReplyDeletesry all
not all people are ignorant and her character (cordell) is among the non-ignorant
ReplyDeleteYou know Luke was doing a very interesting thing. He was showing a perception from a character that was ignorant herself. She, not understanding the customes of Bonita's people, may have easily perseived her as a barbarian. She did live underground, which in itself is a bit unusual or unique. I think that by refering to her as a barbarian he has showen a possible challenge that will make Bonita a more interesting character. She will always have to face this ignorant racism as she endures through the story. Now we can continue to sweep all these first perseptions under the rug, but I think that these first perceptions reflect the view point that our characters may be having regarding other characters.
ReplyDeleteum didn't i just say that cordell is not an ignorant person? hmm maybe not
ReplyDeleteYes it is most likely and most people would have considered her a barbarian living and being the way she was but, as i said before, most people are ignorant in real life as well as in this fantasy world. Most of the important characters in the story are not, that's what sets them above and apart from their normal everyday counterparts known as the common ignorant mass.
Having a character that does think of her as a barbarian is fine, but it shows a severe character flaw and don't voice it.
anyone can be Cordell, I just remembered Luke telling me he didn't want to be her. Anyway, it doesn't matter. it's true that Bonita would be considered a barbarian, but typing it makes me feel like I am a barbarian for choosing such a wild character. so stop calling "me" a barbarian. it's an offensive term. savage isn't much better. make up something, like "earthy". or use her name if the character knows it, which Cordell does.
ReplyDelete